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I love these. (for anyone who doesn't know: http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...term=anti+joke )
Here are some i have come across:
-What's worse than a worm in your apple?
The holocaust.
-A Mexican, a Jew, and a colored guy go into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Get the fuck out of here."
-How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe.
-How do you make a mime yell? Throw a brick at his face.
-What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing.
-What did Batman say to Robin to get him in the car? Get in the car.
-What did the blind, deaf, paraplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.
-Ok, so a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a plane that is going to crash. The captain comes back with two parachutes and yells “Only one of you gets to li-”
The plane explodes in the air. No one survived.
-A duck goes to the pharmacy. He says to the pharmacist, “I need some ointment for my beak. It
is very chapped.” The pharmacist says, “We have nothing for ducks here.”
-Why did the blonde jump of a bridge
She was clinicaly depressed and wanted to kill herself
-A horse walks into a bar.
The bartender escorts it outside, and promptly phones the police.
-How do you confuse a blond?
Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
-Yo mama's so fat that if she doesn't improve her diet and exercise regimen, she is in serious risk of having heart disease.
-How do you make an electrician cry?
Kill his family.
- A latvian finds a magic lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie comes out, saying “I will grant you three wishes.” The Latvian is overjoyed. In a rush, he says “I want potato!” “Your wish is granted!” says the genie, and the Latvian finds himself holding a potato. “What is your next wish?” says the genie. “I wish you go away, so I enjoy potato.” So the genie leaves.
Also, that was the only magic lamp that latvian ever found.