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In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system:
SIMPLE DUTIES
* You make the bed (+1)
* You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
* You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
* You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) In the rain (+8)
* But return with Beer (-5)
* You check out a suspicious noise at night (+1)
* You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
* You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
* You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
* It's her pet (-20)
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
* You stay by her side the entire party (0)
* You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
* Named Tina (-10)
* Tina is a dancer (-20)
* Tina has silicone implants (-80)
HER BIRTHDAY
* You take her out to dinner (+2)
* You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+3)
* Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
* And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
* It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)
A NIGHT OUT
* You take her to a movie (+1)
* You take her to a movie she likes (+3)
* You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
* You take her to a movie you like (-2)
* It's called 'Death Cop' (-3)
* You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans(-15)
YOUR PHYSIQUE
* You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
* You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
* You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
* You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)
THE BIG QUESTION
* She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) (Yes, you lose points no matter what)
* You hesitate in responding (-10)
* You reply, "Where?" (-35)
* Any other response (-20)
COMMUNICATION
* When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
* You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
* You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
* She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-4000)
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.
How do you know all this.... are you married
" Jonny Wilkinson ... still the only man to score in two... Yes two world cup finals"
Seriously? What sort of social losers do you think we ladies are???Originally Posted by Happy
* You stay by her side the entire party (-100)
* You mingle but return to top up her drink when necessary (+20)
That's more like it!![]()
Keeping the Faith ... right here in Perth!
yep I agree with that em!!! ... no wonder it is so hard to find a decent guy! they have read this! dagnam it!
"Believe in the best, think your best, study your best, have a goal for your best, never be satisfied with less than your best, try your best, and in the long run things will turn out for the best."
So you girls want to go out with a waiter????
Posted via space
Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.
" Jonny Wilkinson ... still the only man to score in two... Yes two world cup finals"
The rules are simply. Points may be accrued for various acts of chivalry, but any move to cash in said accrued points will result in their immediate and irreversible negation.
Dear Lord, if you give us back Johnny Cash, we'll give you Justin Bieber.
Unless of course Coach there was any indication tipping you off to the value of said act of chivalry in which case any points accrued will be reduced by a factor of 120%
If the party of the first part uses telepathic skills to decipher the needs of the party of the second part points accrual may commence.
C'mon the![]()
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