Chat Report: 21.02.07

[The Lone Hydrangea]

Morning punters heres the news hot off the TWF press

Honour Roll.

Coach
Exile
Beav
Travelling Gerry
Alcolohic Stalker
BlueandBlack
ORegan
Shaun
Happy
Pruc
Evie
RugbyFan
The aka Tif
Larry from Joisey
Jazza93
Jess
Jedi Knight
Emforcer
Lonzy

Lets rip into it. Been absent for a few weeks so this report could be dodgy and a little suss since I haven't seen a biro for awhile.Dont worry, i will not let the facts get in the way of a good story( i should be working at the Sunday Times)

Lob in at 7.24 and a few familar friendly faces in da house. Alcolohic Stalker aka Brisvegas who happens to be in the pudding club has now been given a new handle, by signed decree from the upper echelons of the Chat(X).
To coincide with the bun in the oven, AS is now known as Mama Stalker!
This is a seriously cool handle, and by christ Mama obviously enjoyed the change in moniker cause Mama had a blinder of a night.

Mr Blue who done a arse kicking job of chat reportage in my absense is securing his premises prior to being overwhelmed by a visit from some undesirable, ie his brother.Cant beat family eh Mr Blue!

Beav has invited the Tlh's to come and watch him belt those shirt lifting Guildford Grammar rugby nancy boys on the 27.07.07.Nice young shaver the Beav(most of the time).We will be there and will bring a biro for any potential scoops as well.

With my strong medical background i suspect Mama Stalker is battling a few hormonal attacks.Mama has screeched that some dirty, scum sucking, bottom feeding, oxygen thief has stolen her chocolate.Now this is just not on and to compound the problem there is some little piano playing sucker who lives over the road continually playing chopsticks, much to Mamas delight.
Jason the forgotten man in this story has done the only wise and sensible thing and has done a runner and locked himself in the cupboard.

The chat is going like the clappers and ive gone through 1 biro already.All sorts of weird and wonderful topics are being covered. Beav waffling on about Maccaroni Cheese, X dribbling on about the Ghost who walks, and if im not mistaken Miss Evie mentioned that brain cancer causing mag the Womens Weekly Even Coach has lost the plot and is having cake issues at home and is beside himself with worry.

Shaun is hyperventilating.Lets talk rugby, so we do.Suggest Force by 12 in my humble opinion. Should be a cracker of a game to celebrate our first home win.Lions will be a handful but the good guys will prevail

Ah a new member knocks on the door and enters.The The arrives.The The is actually the Tif if you get my drift. so am i.Tif logs on via Latvia(home of some visiting skanks if i remember rightly) and is given the The handle.Some of our more astute chat crew didnt have a smick who the The was. Love ya work Tif.

Ah Larry from Joisey pops in, looking sharp as a pound of mince.Explain to Larry to historic qualities of our win in Pretoria last week.One game to stick in the vault and drag out and watch for years to come.

Travelling Gerry has been extremely quiet.Something to do about being less than generous in some of his betting odds. Actually Gerry gets both barrells from some disgruntled punters.Gerry being the bookie he is and cunning as a shithouse rat can see a potential, trouble at mill scenario, generously offers easy money for chat attendees.This goes over a treat with all and i personally retract any snide, nasty remarks i may of inadvertently said about you Gerry. You are indeed a kind and generous fellow.

Meanwhile back in da house, chat is going a million miles an hour.
Shaun is aware of girl germs apparently and more importantly what has this got to do with rugby Shaun?
Lonz our resident master artist has got Gits to sign her new paintings and are currently available for purchase for any TWFer. Sage has posted Gits looks like Darth Vader.Im sure Lonz may discuss this with him in Sydney next week!

Im enjoying the night big time with a few bevvies courtesy of Happy till that nazi Quiz Em pops in. Mention quiz in any form and bloody Gerry and Jedi start of with their mutual admiration society, Barwick Estates, god we are awesome etc etc. Quiz starts and im left in the starting blocks. Frustrated with some adjudications and drop the magic word.After 10 lashes with a wet bootlace i gather my compsure.I apologize for dropping the magic word especially in da house full of ladies.

X has a had a gutfull of some of the little tackers and is cutting a swathe through them. Even Egan gets the lemon and sarse, just for being Egan.
Jess suggests lighting some relaxation candles, so i basically light up Guildford and im feeling warm and fuzzy.This new age caper works.

Night is drawing to a close, Mama Stalker is playing a blinder.Everyone is happy. Happy is in da house somewhere getting a grip. Punters waffling on about nazi dictators, mungoes etc

Bouquets.
Lovely to see so many ladies in da house

Quotes of the night.There are plenty

I'm back, the brats are at school and the bitch is still sleeping...so peaceful. Author L.F.J.

Check out these crackers!

My head hurts, my feet stink and i dont love Jesus...
Author: Jimmy Buffett quoted by X


My baby is kindly rearranging my organs again and it friggin hurts

My baby has a brain

Its outside and i dont want Possum disease
Author: Mama Stalker

Thanks to all who rocked up, fun as usual.

This time next week the InnFORCERs will be on tour in Sydney and on behalf of our tour guru Tif and the travelling crew we will do TWF proud.


God Speed

Tlh

[LarryNJ]

Another fine job mate! Your talents are endless!

We'll expect a detailed report on the Innforcers tour of Sydney!

[travelling_gerry]

IT wont be tooo detailed Larry.....what happens on tour......

[LarryNJ]

alright I understand...just send pics than!

[AlcoholicStalker]

I am disappointed TLH you left out coachs quest to raise the funds to purchase me a bar fridge to thwart the efforts of the chocolate theif!






I wrote my name on all my food this morning and put marks on all the drinks.

[Happy]

just a big sign on the fridge door saying you licked all your food should suffice!!

[The Lone Hydrangea]

Sorry MS had to trim down report to a manageable size, otherwise it was looking a lot like War and Peace.

[jazza93]

hey kool thanks hydrangea.

[Mtbeaver]

Nice write up TLH!

By the way, you're doing a report for the Scotch -v- Guildford game

[Shaun]

You should come to the Hale vs Weasley game as well

[blueandblack]

Nice write up TLH!

By the way, you're doing a report for the Scotch -v- Guildford game

scotch wins. well, whisk(e)y anyway.

[Mtbeaver]

You should come to the Hale vs Weasley game as well

Shaun, even I'm gonna come to that game!

It'll probably be the game of the century!

[fulvio sammut]

Public school rugby is the equivalent of watching a gay movie - you know they are all poofs, but which one is going to be the next prime minister.

[Burgs]

Public school rugby is the equivalent of watching a gay movie - you know they are all poofs, but which one is going to be the next prime minister.

Which is why the PRIVATE Schools Association comp is so much better to watch

Can't say I've watched many gay movies to compare though Fulv

[fulvio sammut]

I was conversing in the English, Burgs. Privately owned schools there are called Public schools. If I was talking about privately owned schools in Western Australia I would have simply called thier pupils wankers, not poofs.
I have never seen a gay movie, though I have seen a lot of hetro/bonk ones on SBS, but I have a vivid imagination.